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Amrin: Even in anger don't forget your manners.
Even in fear, don't forget your morals.
Issue XVIII Cover Feature Empower
Prepared by Dolly Hirawat & Bhagyashree Prabhutendolkar.
Amrin Khalil is a doctor, poet and spoken word artist. Writing has been a part of her life since very young in many forms and currently exists as @amrinkhalilpoetry on Instagram. Her poems often articulate the struggles of WOC, social justice, culture, faith, identity, self love, mental health and breaking Eurocentric beauty standards and stereotypes. Named "Top 7 SouthAsian female poets in 2023" by Desi Blitz.
What makes you feel passionate about poetry? Since when have you been writing poetry?
Amrin: I’ve been writing since I was a kid, first it was fiction and now it’s poetry. I find comfort in writing poetry as an adult as opposed to being a storyteller, because I can say so much more with such few words and I can say difficult things disguised in art. I also find freedom in poetry, in that once it is written, it belongs more to the reader than to the poet to take apart how they like it. It leaves its fingerprints on everyone it touches and relieves me of the burden of carrying those emotions.
Your poetry has served to be a solace and a source of strength for many young women. What has shaped you to be the strong, authentic, vocal young woman that you are today?
Amrin: My experiences and the emotions I borrow from the women around me who share their reality with me. I believe in writing the truth and about everything that makes my blood boil. I tuck distasteful truths in the nooks of most of my poems. So much of my writing is me trying to deconstruct and process my own thoughts and emotions. I’ve gotten braver since I started out, but I definitely have a long way to go.
What does feminism mean to you?
Amrin: I feel like it has been diluted in its meaning and weaponised both by men and women. In recent times, I have felt the movement betray me and leave my people behind. If your ideology of feminism is leaving behind Muslim women, Hijabi women, women who want to be stay-at-home partners/ mothers, women of color, Palestinian women, women who don’t believe and want the same things you do, then that’s not feminism
How has being strongly connected to your religious community and to spirituality/God shaped your faith and strength? According to you, what role does religion or community play in a person’s life?
Amrin: My faith is everything to me. As Muslim, I am a slave of God first before I am anything else. The journey of faith is neither easy nor is it linear. My religion is constantly misunderstood and misrepresented and I’m trying my hand at opening people’s eyes to its beauty with my recent work. Community really shapes your morals and character. It’s very important to know who we surround ourselves with. It brings me to tears some days when I witness what we do out of the love of one another, our shared griefs and beliefs, our shared histories and legacies. It is important to hold on to your roots no matter how far your branches reach.
What has your journey on self-love looked like? Were there any difficulties or prejudices that you faced as a young girl that have shaped you into what you are today?
Amrin: Self love- it was very difficult and something I struggle with till today. As I’ve said before, these journeys are never linear. Some days you have the strength and some days your inner demons get the best of you. I have faced stigma from all sides at all times and broken so many barriers to get where I am today. As a Hijabi girl, I have had to defend and explain my hijab repeatedly, sometimes leading me to shrink and dilute myself in the exhaustion of being othered, whilst as a doctor also constantly fending off the sexist and oppressive misinterpretation many Muslims think is Islam from my own community. It’s been two battles at once. And it is unfortunately something I still face till date. I am so grateful to my parents because they gave me religious knowledge as much as they gave me worldly knowledge and equipped me.
How does being both a doctor (your scientific side) and a poet (your artistic side) add beauty to your life? How did you manage both medicine and poetry and why did you choose medicine?
Amrin: I chose medicine because I wanted to (and conventionally so) make something out of myself, as a little Muslim girl, you are told that you are only fit to be a wife of someone, at least in the community I grew up in and I decided I was gonna be that someone and my parents supported me through it because they saw the talent and hard work. Also I love and admire my father, a surgeon, and I wanted to be more like him. Medicine is such a love-hate journey. Some days I come home feeling so fulfilled and some days I come home with crushing trauma and unimaginable grief. But God always chooses you for the right mission because I love what I do and when the going gets hard I tell myself this verse from the Quran “and whoever saves a life, it will be as if they saved all of humanity” 5:32. I cannot imagine doing anything else. What an honor it is to fight for someone else’s life. My medical world intersects a lot with my poetry. Medicine is not all brains, it’s a lot of compassion, counseling, interpersonal skill, choice of words and a marriage of mixed emotions. Of course it translates into my art, sometimes it is the driving force. But med school as such really beats the creativity out of you, at least the Indian Government Medical system does, putting us on survival mode. Now that I’ve graduated, I’m hoping to exercise my creative muscles more.
Recently, India has been facing a lot of communal struggles with the changing political scenario. How does it make you feel and what do you think can repair this damage and make India a harmonious, united country again?
Amrin: The recent political climate in India, of course, makes me feel threatened. The current government has only furthered the divide. The hate is so strong and scary. What can repair this country? The youth. The new generation of voters are far more sensible and far less prejudiced and I pray that this country is revived. We are no different from one another when we are stripped of our souls. I will continue giving you Biryani for Eid and continue to accept your Diwali sweets. May we hoist each other up then pull each other down and respect and honor all our beliefs.
According to you, what is the biggest challenge facing young girls in India? If you could say one line of encouragement to any young girl who doesn’t feel good enough or supported enough to realize her full potential- what would you say?
Amrin: Their own people. It’s most often our own families and communities that hold us down. You don’t have to shrink to fit into small minds. Everyone will discourage and ridicule you, you keep working that ladder of dreams. Commit yourself to your smaller goals so you can use those victories as proof when you set out to chase the big ones that require external support. Someday you’ll be so high up you can’t hear them anymore.
9. What is the one thing that keeps you grounded? What are some of the biggest life lessons you have learnt till date?
Amrin: God and medicine. Life lessons- even in anger we need to maintain our manners and even in fear we need to hold fast to our morals. Don’t let that compass die.
RAPID FIRE ROUND WITH AMRIN
Describe yourself in three words.
Advice for your younger self.
Your favorite poet
Your biggest accomplishment till date
What keeps you going when life seems tough.
The most touching thing someone has said to you.
Favorite line from your poems
Last line of your autobiography
Amrin's Social Handles:
Creative. Cheerful. Talkative.
Keep praying because prayers and hard work is what got us here.
Ocean Vuong, Warsan Shire, Agha Shahid Ali, and Noor Unnahar
Getting the Dr before my name purely by merit.
My faith and poetry. When I need to understand what my questions are, I write. When I need the answers, I pray.
“You will be the one to open the gate for everyone behind you”
Even hurricanes need the sea.
That kindness is the legacy I left behind.